I can look back over my life and remember key moments when I felt God drawing me closer to Him. Sometimes, I could literally feel the tugging on my heart to spend more time with Him in prayer or in worship. Other times, my spirit would feel heavy and weighed down by the burdens of life and He would remind me to just come lay them down at His feet (Matt. 11:28-30).
As the scent of sweet nectar draws the buzzing bees and other insects to feast, the human soul is drawn to the sweet, refreshing waters of the Spirit of God (John 7:37-39). There is an overflow of life, peace and abundant joy awaiting the thirsting soul. But what happens when my soul is no longer thirsty?
During those periods when I would be so drawn to God, I couldn't get enough of Him. I wanted to spend every moment soaking in His presence, diving into His Word, pouring out prayers and petitions to Him with no interference. I would immediately dismiss every distraction because nothing compared to being with Jesus.
Then the day would come where I wouldn't feel drawn by God to do anything with Him. I know! Certainly, this means God wants me to relax, take a break and just do something that I enjoy. So I did just that. Then one day turned into another and before long, that feeling of God drawing me closer to Him became no more than a distant memory. Questions filled my mind.
How did this happen? Is this the result of some sin in my life? Is God angry with me or disappointed in me? Was I selfish for doing something I enjoyed instead of spending more time with Him?
Drawn to God
No one can ever come to God without first being drawn by Him. I believe that every person at some point in his/her life is drawn by God, thus begins what is commonly referred to as the spiritual journey. We can either respond to the drawing of God or ignore it. Should we choose to respond, we begin taking steps to draw closer to God hoping to achieve some level of knowledge, understanding or experience.
Taste and See
The savory aroma escaping the stove and oven within a kitchen fills the nostrils of every passerby, beckoning him to step inside for a taste. Similarly, we are drawn to God and when we've tried Him, meaning we experience God or achieve some new knowledge or understanding of Him, it's as though we've sampled something so good that we just have to get some more of it! Like a Thanksgiving meal, we do not stop feasting until we are completely satisfied and can't eat another bite.
Full of God
God fills heaven and earth (Jeremiah 23:24), but cannot be contained within its vastness. Likewise, within each of us is a void, or emptiness, and God draws us so that He can fill us with Himself. If you've never been filled with the Holy Spirit of God like the
disciples and all believers throughout Acts, there is no
experience that compares to it! Jesus warned
that without this experience, we can't see or enter the
Kingdom of God (John 3:3-5).
So when we become "full" of His Spirit, and when we are "full" or satisfied with new knowledge or understanding of God, and when the euphoria of this experience fades away,
will we choose to want more of God?
It wasn't wrong for me to do something I enjoy. I didn't anger God by
doing so. But do I only enjoy His fellowship when He draws me? When I'm no longer feeling drawn to God, I have to decide if I still want more. Not based on what I feel, but based on what I know.
I may not feel God pulling me deeper in prayer, but I know that when I pray in faith He hears and responds (2 Kings 20:5). I may not feel drawn to deeper worship, but I know that He is worthy of my worship (Psalm 29:2). I may not feel drawn to deeper Bible study, but I know that when I study His Word I become more aware of who He is and all that He does (2 Timothy 3:16-17). When I no longer feel God pulling me, I have to decide if I want to draw any closer or stay where I am. It takes discipline to keep pursuing Him, but when this is fueled by an inner desire to know Him, the journey will never end.
